It’s been nearly six years since former football star O.J. Simpson was found guilty of kidnapping and armed robbery at Palace Station, but given how much he’s been plugging our news feeds since then, you’d think he was a free man:
2009
Simpson appeals his conviction to the Nevada Supreme Court, which upholds the conviction in 2010.
2012
As if writing 2006’s If I Did It, a hypothetical account of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, wasn’t bad enough, Simpson tries to sell the knife he allegedly used in those murders for $5 million. Nothing ever comes of it.
2012
Simpson tries to get a new trial, arguing that his attorney, Yale Galanter, was “ineffective.”
2013
While awaiting a decision on his new trial, Simpson is granted parole on some of his charges, with the possibility of getting out in 2017. Later that year, his request for a new trial is denied.
2013
In something straight out of Orange Is the New Black, Simpson is caught stealing oatmeal cookies and hiding them in his shirt. Inmates reportedly laugh as a guard removes the cookies one by one and throws them on the floor.
Just a few days ago
Simpson’s lawyers resubmit the Nevada Supreme Court appeal seeking a new trial. Hope—and headlines, apparently—spring eternal for The Juice.